I have hit the bottom recently hence the lack of the posts.  Most of the days I dont even want to get out of the bed or do anything, just sulk and stare at the wall. I do not expect anyone to understand the things I am going through, even though there have been few brighter moments however the regrets are holding me back more than ever, and they hurt more than being torn to shreds.

I hate my lil one continually asking me why am I crying or why am I sad when I cannot articulate it in words, but sometimes my 4 year olds pearls of wisdom make me cheer up at least for the moment. I started doing ebay again hiping it would inspire me to try harder.  The sales are going as expected considering the economic panic that everyone is going through, some sold some didnt but I will keep pushing along, and hopefully build up my audience.

 I am really enjoying the life drawing group on tuesday nights at the gallery. I went to few sessions already. I find it very challenging to work with the 2 minute poses but I am improving.  When I get happy with the level they are at I will be happy to post them and share them. 

Danijela, new friend I met through painters group she is life-saver.  I could never thank her enough for giving me the strength to get through the week.  Our kids are playing together so that part is awesome. Nana is much happier for it.  She is now going to playgroup 3 times a week, and playing with other kids during which I get to drink at least a cup of coffee with a group of mothers, and realise some of us are all in the same boat. Being a parent is very challenging, and it is hard sometimes to push through the day and try to figure out what is all the best.

I created many new paintings and pencil drawing I am slowly working on.  It is slowly progressing.  I am hoping to enter that drawing when it is finished to the art contest next month, I hope I finish it.  The scan is not the best because scanner has this funny thing about losing half of shadows and midtones.

I am however planning solo show for 2009.  I got gallery in Melbourne lined up, however now I have to line up the finances for the advertising and someone to mind lil one while I am gallery sitting for the month.  I get the gallery space for free which is good, it is near me so that lowers the transport cost significantly.  I am planning it for september so that will give me plenty of time to have about 60 paintings ready to be hung on the wall, and hopefully some of them sold. I am working my butt off towards it. I am hoping it gives me the strength to continue and at least pull me out a lil bit from gloom and doom I am currently going through.

I will have few drawings on show in November and in December more details to come when I am ready for it.